The Oreo Incident
by TheBandNerd
Summary: Tony and Bruce are suffering from caffeine deficiency, and Tony finds Oreos. Craziness in-sues. This is a crack fic. T just to be safe.


**A/N: So I'm back with another one-shot! Took me longer than expected, but what matters is that I actually wrote something! Anyways, I would like to thank Madame Penguin for the idea behind this fic. It helped me out of my writer's block. This is not the best thing I've ever written, but oh well. This is not Beta'd so be warned. Any and all mistakes are mine, and it's my fault if it sucks. And the characters might be a little OOC, but that's because I haven't written anything before this in this fandom. So now that my rant of excuses is over, let the reading begin! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the plot. And the idea isn't even originally mine. Fail. And if I did own the Avengers and anything affiliated with it, there would be some major Brony. **

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Bruce Banner and Tony Stark were on their second day of practically no sleep. They had spent the past two days working on a Hulk proof room so that the Big Guy could be let out once in a while. Bruce was hesitant at first, but decided it would be a good way to hopefully keep the Other Guy under control more. Of course, Tony just wanted to learn more about the Hulk, and what better way to do it than make him a room that is completely Hulk proof, where he can be himself and smash whatever the hell he wants. It would be a great way to observe the Hulk and try to get Bruce to see that the big guy was not all that bad. Anyways, they were tired and needed more coffee. Or anything with sugar and caffeine. And this is how the "Oreo Incident" started.

"Hey babe. I'm gonna go get some coffee, want some?" Tony asked while adding something to the blue print before making his way to the door. "Sure. Thanks." Bruce said, and walked over to give Tony a quick peck on the cheek. Though Tony didn't want just a peck and went in for a proper kiss. He caught Bruce by the lips and thought he was going to be able to continue, but Bruce softly pushed him away. "Nuh-uh. Coffee. Now. Unless you want us to both collapse because of caffeine deficiency." Tony sighed, reluctantly turning away from his beautiful boyfriend, and trudged off to get more coffee.

O~o~O

While on his way out of the kitchen with the miracle liqiud, Tony noticed a distinct blue package of one of the best foods in the world. _Well, we are running on fumes. A little sugar with our caffeine won't hurt And I'm sure Bruce will love the surprise. _So he grabbed the Oreos and made his way quickly down to the lab.

O~o~O

Bruce was quietly working on trying to find a compound strong enough to resist the Hulk when Tony busted into the lab and proclaimed, "Look what I found Brucey! The example of perfection!" Bruce slightly jumped, then looked questioningly at Tony, until he discovered the package of Oreos in Tony's hand. "Great! Now get your butt over here and start working again." At this, Tony childishly hpmhed, but still started back to work, munching on the Oreos along with Bruce. After they finished the first package, both were slightly disappointed in their lack of pastry perfection; however, Tony remembered that he had seen more packages in the kitchen when he left and just couldn't carry them down the first time he went up there. He raced back up stairs and grabbed the other two packages and hurried back down to an impatiently waiting Bruce. In the middle of fiddling with the seal on the first new package, Tony had a brilliant idea.

"Hey Bruce, how bout we make an automatic Oreo dispenser?" Tony grinned from ear to ear at his amazing idea. "Why in the world you want to make an automatic dispenser for Oreos? And anyways, we are working on something already. So, no." Bruce gave Tony a stern look, sometimes he just didn't know what his boyfriend was thinking. "Awwww. Come one Brucey. Pleease? Then we won't have to worry about messing with the seal every time we want a cookie." Tony gave Bruce The Puppy-Dog Eyes, which he knew he couldn't refuse. Bruce sighed and gave in to the eyes. "Fine. But only because I have never liked dealing with that stupid seal." Tony's eyes lit up like a young child's and he quickly went over to Bruce and pecked him on his lips. "I knew you wouldn't be able to resist my charm" Tony said, winking. "Because that's totally why I agreed…" Bruce mumbled.

O~o~O

Within an hour of starting on the automatic Oreo dispenser, they had finished the two packages off. Shortly after that, they finished the first version of the automatic Oreo dispenser. To say they were on a sugar high was an understatement. Three packages of Oreos plus coffee equals hyperactive Bruce and Tony. Though of course, they needed more Oreos to sustain this sugar high. "JARVIS! Contact Pepper and tell her to grab three packages of Oreos!" Tony yelled to JARVIS. They needed more Oreos to test the dispenser! "Yes sir. has been notified and is on her way to get them now" informed JARVIS's smooth, British voice. While waiting for Pepper to be back, Tony was bouncing in his seat, trying to figure out what to do. He didn't want to go back to working on the blue print, it was boring. He wouldn't be able to focus on it. His brilliant mind was sifting through a multitude of ideas, until he had one that would cure his boredom and give him a way to let his energy out. "Hey Bruce. Wanna build a trampoline?" he asked grinning widely. "W-what? In the middle of the lab?" Bruce stuttered. "Yeah! It's big enough, and it's not like this is like most of the other labs with a lot of equipment everywhere. This is more like a workshop, so there is plenty of room." Tony looked to Bruce expectantly. "No Tony. We need to be working on the blue print." "But-" "No." Tony knew he wouldn't win this argument verbally, so he pulled out the secret weapon again- The Puppy Dog Eyes. After seeing The Puppy Dog Eyes, Bruce finally gave in. He thought that after seeing them once today he would be immune the next time Tony decided to pull them out, but alas, he was a sucker for The Puppy-Dog Eyes. "I guess we can build a trampoline. It would be a good way to use some of this extra energy." During this little tiff, Tony had noticed that Bruce was a little bouncy and jittery too. So for the next few hours it took Pepper to get out of work and get the cookies, Dr. Banner and Tony Stark built a trampoline.

O~o~O

Pepper Potts entered Stark Tower expecting Tony and Bruce to be working in the lab on some sort of scientific experiment or project like normal. What she didn't expect when she walked into the lab was for said men to be bouncing on a trampoline like two five year olds. She dropped the grocery bag in her hand and exclaimed, "What the hell?! When did you build a trampoline?! You were supposed to be working on science experiments, not building toys for children!" Tony looked over to her and was about to explain when he saw the bag of Oreos she had dropped. He raced over and grabbed it, then went back to Bruce so they could dig in. "Thanks" Tony quipped before turning his attention to the food. Pepper was speechless for a minute, and then quickly came to her senses. She did a quick once over of the room, and noticed the three empty cookie packages scattered on one of the tables. Then she noticed the two men eating more Oreos and putting them into some device that looked suspiciously like a cookie dispenser. "Oh no you don't! You two aren't getting anymore Oreos today! You both are acting like little boys on Halloween who have had too much candy and you need to get back to whatever it was you were working on before you got into this sugar high." Pepper berated. "But mooooom!" Tony whined. "But nothing. You are two grown men acting like hyperactive five year olds. Get back to work. I will come back in about an hour and a half to see if you two are actually working." She gave each of them a stern look, grabbed the Oreos, then turned and left. "Damn it! She took our Oreos! Now what are we supposed to do?!" Tony questioned. "Um… get back to work on the room?" Bruce suggested. "Nuh uh! That is too boring! I say we make our own Oreos. We are scientists! It shouldn't be that hard."

O~o~O

Another hour later, the two men covered in chocolate batter of some sorts, and a crème filling that was, for some odd reason, green. "Ooookay. We obviously can't make Oreos worth a shit. But, I'm sure we will find something to do." Tony stated, only slightly defeated that he was incapable of something. But it was culinary related, so it didn't bother him as much as it would have if it had been something engineering or scientific related. "Well, we could actually listen to Pepper and get back to work. You know, so when she checks up on us, she won't be too mad at us?" Bruce tried to suggest. An angry Pepper Potts was a force to be reckoned with. "Hell no! She isn't our mother! And besides, I could talk us out of trouble." Tony replied with a confident grin. "I'll say. You have such a big mouth; you could probably talk for hours straight…" Bruce murmured. He didn't expect for Tony to actually hear it. "What was that?" Tony demanded. "Nothing honey" Bruce said with an overly innocent smile and pecked Tony on the cheek. And that reminded Tony of the kiss that Bruce owed him from earlier. "I know what we can do." Tony stated with a smirk. It was one of those mischievous smirks that stated 'I solemnly swear I am up to no good' and Bruce was slightly afraid of what would result from it. Though, instead of going over to a table to work on God knows what, like Bruce espected, Tony purposefully made his way over to Bruce and plopped himself on his lap. "How bout we finish what we started earlier " Tony whispered into Bruce's ear, making him shiver when he felt Tony's breath against his ear. "F-finish wh..." Bruce was trying to say when he felt a very skilled mouth working at his neck. He felt Tony bite and suck, and he knew he was gonna have a hickey for a few days. "Hey now, g-go easy on the hickeys..*gasp*.. I d-don't want to deal with Barton's jabs if he sees one" Bruce stutters out. Tony complies and slowly moves up his neck, covering it with light kisses on the way, and finally to his lips. He lingers for a little bit, teasing Bruce, but Bruce Banner doesn't like to be teased. Bruce lunges forward and captures Tony's lips with his own. Their mouths move quickly over each other, and soon Tony gently bites Bruce's bottom lip, making Bruce gasp, and uses this opportunity to slip his tongue into Bruce's mouth. He expertly explores the wet, hot cavern, and is soon pushed back by a rather forceful tongue. Bruce decides he needs to have a little control too, and pushes into Tony's mouth with his tongue. He explores every nook and cranny of his boyfriend's mouth, and eventually their tongues fight for dominance. Things start getting a little heated, and soon hands are roaming. Tony's hand travels under Bruce's purple button up shirt and Bruce's hand go to cup Tony's nice ass. Soon a very callous, skilled hand works its way down to Bruce's belt. At this time, Pepper decides she should check in on the boys. Though when she walks into to the lab, she sees something she wishes she hadn't. Bruce and Tony pull apart quickly when they see Pepper. Tony clears his throat and is about to try and say something when Pepper stops him. "Don't. I am just gonna walk out and try to imagine that I didn't see that." It wasn't that she didn't know about their relationship, everyone knew, and it didn't bother her too much, it was just that this was the first time she had walked in on them making out. It was one of the most awkward situations she had ever been in. As she walked out, Tony looked at Bruce and said, "Well, that went rather well. No yelling or screaming about bleeding eyes or needing brain bleach." Bruce just looks at his boyfriend like he was crazy, which he knew was true, and wonders how that went well. But instead of arguing with Tony, he just sighs and suggests they go to their room, maybe finish what they started not too long ago, and try to get some sleep before going back to work the next day. Tony agrees, and they make their way up to their room. Besides, Tony knows he is going to need to have energy to deal with the really awkward tension that is sure to permeate tower for the next few days…

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**A/N: R&R please. I love reviews. They make everything warm and fluffy. And they keep me writing. :)**


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